anna kiss

A Minute of Revolution

I’ll tell you what –

The seconds where I’m having to force psychotic tendencies away from my skin

like I was singing and you were still and not haunting me in inches

not seizing me

each mind movement a prisoner

these are the battles that I fight alone and unseen

everyday in corners of coffee houses and bookstores

in corners, cowering, hoping

that you’ll go away,

in corners

I want to lock you and beat you and scream you and shape you into the

Everything you never had or wanted or looked at.

I’ll tell you what –

next time they come around here

asking questions like

gods in robes

made with gold or wool or water

and I’m unprepared,

I’m gonna have to take some sort of action

to expel them from this brain like I’ve been trying to do these last two years.

like I’ve been trying to form some other thought besides you for two years now

and it’s only going to take a moment of confrontation and revelation

which I know, but never see you

to talk to you and tell you and show you and wish you were dead.

And begin the revolution of love and thought spinning inside my head. So…

I’ll tell you what –

you take me and lose me and forget me and shake me right out of shells

and all the holes that I’m digging

and give me the life I loved and wanted and shrieked for two years

and make me quit thinking of you

in constant motion and spinning around the earth

in clouds that you were stuck in as prisoners like Tantalus on roller coasters in the sky

like you were a child of Cronus swallowed whole and gods scratch you with lightening and I hate you with everything

and when you make this all right for instances

while maintaining the ability for me to write alright

and when you face up to facts and let go of alternate universes

and when I can look at you without hating me

and when you can feel purity pumping through your blood and

once you’ve found me my soul mate and once you realize maybe you were him and

once you teach me how to let go as I tell everyone else to do the same thing

and when you get me beyond good schools

and hand me the ability to let novels drip from fingers like it was raining

and when you give me everything I ever asked for and

get down on your knees and beg to me and I tell you to stop

and then I tell you to start again and the I tell you what –

I’m through with complicating me for you.