8.20.2001

the craziness of my environment just now is suffocating because i have no occasion to rise to, no duty to uphold, no basic responsibility. i am hidden in my cubicle trying desperately to think of something interesting to think, to type here. there is nothing coming. this weekend i went home again and saw my family and talked to the eccentric man at the organic booth at the farmer's market and i had little sleep and i went canoeing and i drank a mocha with skim milk, which i usually don't do, and it all made me feel apart of something and made me want again, some more, to have my own children to take to the farmer's market and pick out funny looking eggplants with. there is something lovely about it really. picking out eggplants. they are purple, deeply so, and some of the ones we looked at were deformed like fruit is in the wild, and they were doubly egged, like siamese eggs, only purple and fruity and glistening in the sprinkling rain, seemingly dew-soaked, only with no dew. we started to load up our organic lettuce and our inorganic, though mutated, eggplants, and bread and such when my mom decided we needed cider and an organic wildflower bouquet. so my step-father and i jumped back out of the car to buy these aesthetic necessities. he bought the cider, which took seconds, and i got in line for the bouquet, which did not. the eccentric man was giving a woman a hard time for having never seen seinfeld because she owns no tvs, just organic vegetables. he invited her over for dinner and seinfeld. i suppose the fact of her unseeing is interesting as most americans who are caucasian and live in cities, i'm sure, have seen seinfeld at some time or another, perhaps even watched it repeatedly or religiously. it was indeed a cultural phenomenon of sorts - an integral part of our popular culture and thus our american identity. most everyone has seinfeld quotes that run in their heads periodically, or perhaps i am speaking from a specific group identity. i suppose these statements are full of huge generalizations, but this web format stuff is not about truth, it's about speculation and opinion reaching for truth, and perhaps, occasionally, however rarely, touching on it.

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